Forget the apocalypse—Google’s James Manyika is calling out tech doom-mongers who promised a mass-extinction event for your career. It seems those dramatic predictions about white-collar jobs vanishing were just convenient fiction to spice up a pitch deck.
Oh, look, another corporate fairytale where global tech giants decided competition is for losers. While we were busy worrying about storage space, TDK and NHK Spring were allegedly playing Monopoly with our wallets for thirteen long years.
Forget sci-fi overlords with massive brains. The AI apocalypse is coming, but it’s dressed as a mildly distracted teenager who doesn't know how to spell and takes forever to reply. Peer-reviewed science confirms we are officially doomed to chat with bots forever.
Finally, a messaging app for when the apocalypse hits or you're just trying to sneakily chat with your neighbor across the street. Who needs gigabit fiber when you can blink your way into someone's DMs?
Anthropic unleashed its new Mythos model to hunt for security vulnerabilities. It worked so well that burned-out developers, already drowning in AI spam, are literally pleading with the tech giant to turn the machine off.
Ah, the sweet smell of import-substitution. Russia's premium sovereign OS, which is totally not just repackaged Debian, is reportedly running to a massive tech holding to avoid being foreclosed by a state-owned bank. Peak domestic stability.
Russian state-owned Sber is back with another "Giga"-branded miracle, launching an AI-agent platform to automate routine office tasks without developers. Because nothing says cutting-edge innovation like trying to replace paper-pushers with hallucinating bots.
Russia's cyber defense gurus at FSTEC just dropped a revolutionary guide on how to not get knocked offline by DDoS attacks. Because nothing says "we have everything under control" like publishing basic networking manuals while your state portals are constantly taking a nap.
Remember when Sony threw billions at the creators of Halo thinking they bought a golden goose? Well, that goose just got cooked, stuffed, and served cold. It turns out buying expensive studios in pricey neighborhoods isn't the cheat code to infinite live-service money.
Nothing says "everything is going according to plan" quite like a desperate government demand to audit your tiny digital wallets. FNS is politely asking everyone to hand over their foreign cash logs, because keeping track of actual money is hard these days.
Deleting compromised credentials should stop hackers immediately, right? Not in Google's world, where "deleted" actually means "feel free to hang around and steal data for a bit longer."
When your 'offshore secure hosting' is actually just a poorly disguised front for Russian state hackers, getting raided by Dutch special agents is basically a scheduled feature, not a bug. Grab some popcorn, folks.